Well, I have no great excuses for why it has taken me so long to write Part 5 of our story. I honestly have been putting it off. Not because it is emotional or hard. It is because I cannot do justice to this part of our story. I have tried and tried to think of a way to write this part to even somewhat capture the feelings I experienced over these precious day, but I cannot. So I fear my attempt will fall short of accurately expressing this event, but here it goes.
Well from March 5th to March 8th, life was a whirlwind. We immediately switched gears from preparing for me to leave the country, to preparing our home and hearts for a baby. There were multiple phone calls to our caseworker asking about details we had forgotten to ask. Brainstorming about just the right gift to give our birth mom. Then of course the one thing I had no way to prepare for, what to say to our sweet birth mom. For anyone reading this who might be looking for some insight on what to say to the woman who is going to entrust you with her baby, I cannot help you. There was no way for me to prepare. We prayed A TON! That is the only preparation I could come up with.
March 8th- I will never forget that phone call. I was standing in the checkout lane a Target paying for my things. (DO NOT JUDGE ME! We needed diapers and formula!) My phone rang, on the other end I heard the best words ever spoken to me, "Mary, Isaiah was born about an hour ago. He is healthy and doing great! His birth mom is doing well also, and she would like you to come tomorrow as planned." I cried in the Target checkout line. I then hurriedly grabbed my things and rushed to call Adam. I told him our great news! We had a son! I sat in my car and cried some more. I prayed. I thanked and praised my Lord! Then I went and bought a car seat!
Isaiah's birth mom had asked that she spend 24 hours with him before we came to meet her and him. When I tell people that part of our story, I get a common question. "Did that make you nervous?" To be honest with you, No. I never thought twice about it. I can't say that either of us ever thought there was a possibility that we would not bring our son home with us. Looking back, I think, sure, the potential was there. Any birth mom can change their mind. It does happen. We really never had anything in us tell us to be concerned it would happen to us.
March 9th (our twins birthday!) we woke up and celebrated them! Adam had already taken the day off work, because he was supposed to be with the kids while I was gone. So we had a fantastic morning celebrating our double blessings! As the time grew closer to heading to the hospital, I grew more and more anxious. I will admit, I have never been so nervous in my entire life. My husband on the other hand, took a short nap before we left for the hospital! In the car on the way to the hospital the fear and anxiety grew. What do you say to a woman who is allowing you to love and care for her son? I had nothing. When we stepped out of the car and started walking toward the hospital entrance, an incredible peace came over me. I had no more fear. I was calm. There was no anxiety. It was surreal. It was a peace that surpassed all of my understanding. It was not me, it was our Lord. I could not believe we were walking in to meet our son. Our son that we had loved for months prior to his existence. Our son that we had already prayed for and cried for so many times. Now we would have a face to complete the picture of the sweet boy already in our hearts.
As we walked with our caseworker into the hospital room we met her. Our sweet birth mom. Then just like that, it happened. We became family. She was so sweet and strong when she asked us, "do you want to meet your son?" I cried. I cried a lot. She was so strong. How could I have only met this woman but have a love for her that felt like it would burst out of my heart? Then there was Isaiah. He was beautiful! All of the time, the waiting, the uncertainties, the money, all of it, he was worth all of it and more. We sat and held our son. We didn't have to tell ourselves to love him. We didn't have to tell ourselves, he was our son. We just did, we just knew. He was just as much our son as the two little boys sitting next to me that had been pulled from my uterus. Isaiah was pulled from my heart.
We spent over an hour sitting, holding and talking. She was so easy to talk to. She was so easy to love. We asked her questions. She asked us questions. I wanted to know this woman. I already knew she was strong, beautiful, loving, and brave. I wanted to know what had made her that way. I wanted to know, so that when we talk to Isaiah about his birth mom, he knows how amazing she is.
While we talked that day, she shared with us that adoption wasn't her first choice. She had actually scheduled an appointment and actually had gone to her appointment to "take care" of her pregnancy another way. She said she sat in the waiting room and something inside of her told her "don't do it." She got up and walked out. She then decided on adoption. Now, I cannot say this with absolute certainty, but I believe we prayed her out of that clinic. You see, there is a clinic not to far from the hospital that we where at that performs abortions. We drove past this clinic on countless occasions. We actually had walked there just a few months prior. Every time we passed it or stopped in front of it. We prayed. We prayed, not just for the babies. We prayed for the girls. We prayed for her.
If you get anything from reading this, get this, PRAY! Even if you are not sure who you are praying to, or why you are praying, PRAY! Give him a chance to show you! And if you know you are praying to our Lord and Savior, I urge you to do this, pray HUGE prayers! Do it! He is capable of answering! Be prepared though, he will change your life and take you somewhere you never thought you would be!
When we left the hospital that day I hugged that amazing woman. I hugged her and cried and thanked her. She comforted me! She thanked me! She is truly amazing. We kissed our sweet baby boy goodbye for the day and left him in the care of his loving mama. She never let him out of her sight while we were not there at the hospital. She soaked in every bit of him that she could. Her love for him, surpasses mine hands down. She loved him so much she sacrificed herself for him. Oh how I love her.
